Friday, September 26, 2008

What is Domestic Violence?

Domestic Violence can look like many different things. It can also include types of sexual assault. There is also a new term called "Intimate Partner Violence" (IPV) which refers to abuse between two people in a close relationship, including past and present partners. No matter what someone's gender, sexual orientation, race or class ANYONE can be a victim of domestic violence. The power and control wheel (this one posted on The Riley Center website) illustrates some of the behaviors that are abuse:

Sometimes people do not even realize that what is happening to them is considered domestic violence and that they have a legal and human right to protection. Here is one story from a man who was beaten by his wife:

"I'm your basic middle class male who was raised to respect women and never hit them. I consider myself a good provider and who has had some success after my hard work has paid off with my authoring 2 best selling books and having sold a self-started company. I work hard and am a decent man. I am also one of those in total disbelief this would ever happen to me.

I hate the term battered man, I'm a DV survivor. And I can say the system (judicial, police, legal, local and state government agencies) does virtually nothing to help a man survive when they're on the receiving end of a female sociopath's attacks. In fact, the system has, in some ways, injured me more than my ex wife ever could.

My wife slapped me hard after I said no to her wanting to get donor sperm in order to get pregnant. Keep in mind her fertility doctor said there were NO physical problems with either of us to prevent her from getting pregnant. Keep in mind we'd only been trying for 4 months, but she felt entitled and was willing to beat anyone down who got in the way. . ."


You can read the rest here, as well as other stories from survivors.


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